


There's Loving In Your Eyes That Pulls Me Closer

by xLoveMx



Series: Jester&Essek's adventures in Sending [6]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Angst, Oral Sex, Vaginal Sex, jessek - Freeform, lots of feels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-11
Updated: 2020-10-11
Packaged: 2021-03-08 02:08:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,846
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26957848
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xLoveMx/pseuds/xLoveMx
Summary: Jester wanted him, yes, but she also wanted him to stay and hold her, kiss her whenever she blinked her eyes open sleepily and she wanted him to love her.
Relationships: Jester Lavorre/Essek Thelyss
Series: Jester&Essek's adventures in Sending [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1797520
Comments: 2
Kudos: 27





	There's Loving In Your Eyes That Pulls Me Closer

**Author's Note:**

> I was never planning on writing as much as I did for this series, but these two have stolen my heart <3 So I'm glad that I stuck with it and that you guys enjoyed them! I might have a little something planned as some sort of Epilogue, but for now have this! xx

„Essek?“ Jester’s hand was still raised from where she had knocked on the door to his temporary room softly, but there hadn’t been any answer so far. They had separate rooms, of course, so there wouldn’t be any suspicions, and while Jester would have snuck to his room last night, there simply hadn’t been any time.

They had watched the Ruby perform and then Jester had lost track of Essek, who had been pulled into playing a round of cards by Beau and then talked to Caleb about what she assumed was wizard stuff, and at some point, which must have been way past midnight, they had all gone off to bed and she had fallen asleep before she could even think about going to his room.

“Essek?” There was still no response, and Jester considered simply slipping into the room, when she heard footsteps approaching from down the corridor. Turning to look, and ready to come up with a plausible excuse, she was suddenly greeted by her mother’s smile. “Mama? You’re up already?” It couldn’t be later than 7 at this point, and unless she had company, the Ruby usually slept in.

“Jester Darling,” Her smile became warmer as she approached, shaking her head slowly. “I had...company for most of the night and when they left, I took a nice bath and picked up a book I haven’t been able to put down,” She then chuckled. “If you are looking for your friend, he left very early. I saw him when I was getting a snack from the kitchen,”

Jester felt her heart sink, and her disappointment must have shown on her face, because Marion reached out to rest a hand on her arm. “I’m sure he had a good reason. You said he was involved in politics in his country, yeah?”

Jester nodded, biting down on her lip to keep the tears from falling. It wasn’t the first time he had been gone the next morning, but with how they had left things yesterday it just didn’t feel right that they didn’t get to talk again.

“Oh my little Sapphire,” Marion had reached out again, her fingers beneath Jester’s chin to lift it up. Instead of a reply, Jester moved in, throwing her arms around her mother as she buried her face against the other woman’s chest.

“How do you do it?” She eventually whispered; the familiar warmth at least somewhat comforting. She was aware that they were standing in the middle of the corridor, and that each of her friends, or any other guests, could walk in on them any given minute, but Jester really couldn’t bring herself to care. “How do you...sleep with so many people and don’t fall in love?”

A soft chuckle came as a response while Marion ran her fingers through her daughter’s hair. “It’s my work, and while I enjoy it, very much so, I put on a show. I don’t give these people all of myself. There’s parts that I keep to myself or...well I gave them to your father,” There was a brief moment of silence, before Marion continued, “You love him, don’t you?” 

Jester felt her mother pull back a little, and then her hand came up to rest against Jester’s face, wiping away some of the tears that had now began to fall.

It had started out with innocent flirtations, and Jester still remembered the excitement she had felt when he had returned her messages, admitting that he thought about her the way she thought about him, and maybe she hadn’t thought this far ahead, because sex was fun and while she had been crushing on Fjord before, that had been fairly innocent and it didn’t compare to the things she felt for Essek.

Jester wanted him, yes, but she also wanted him to stay and hold her, kiss her whenever she blinked her eyes open sleepily and she wanted him to love her.

“What am I supposed to do?” she whispered, leaning into her mother’s touch as she blinked a few more tears away.

“Well, I suggest you talk to him. I...can read people very well, and I doubt he would have come all this way if he didn’t at least care for you a little bit, especially if he didn’t just come to spend the night in bed with you.” Glancing up to meet her mother’s eyes, Jester tried to ignore the way her heart was simultaneously hurting and missing a beat.

“I will, thank you Mama.”

_Possibly. Maybe._ The thing was: Jester had never been good at talking about her feelings, she had learned to keep them all in to not be a bother to anyone, and she had a feeling that Essek was much the same.

“Good, my little Sapphire. Now shall we have some cinnamon pasties to make this day a little better?”

-

Essek hadn’t heard from Jester in three days. Most of his meetings with the Bright Queen and the rest of the Dens took up the entire day, but he always found himself waiting for a message to interrupt and make him smile, and it never came.

Of course he had thought about messaging her first, much like he had spent that entire night wondering if he should have snuck into her room. Jester hadn’t messages him though, or dropped any hints that she wanted him to, and Essek wasn’t one to come in uninvited. He had stood with his hand raised that morning, too, ready to knock and at least say goodbye, but something had compelled him to let her sleep.

_You were being a coward_ , a voice in the back of his head reminded him, and Essek almost winced. “I know...” He then muttered to himself, closing the book he had been attempting to read. It was of no use though, because his thoughts kept coming back to Jester and it was very distracting. So instead he put the book aside and waved his fingers through the air for a moment, sending off the spell.

_“Jester. How are you doing?”_

For someone as eloquent with words as him, Essek didn’t trust himself to convey what he was feeling in just twenty-five words, so this would have to do. A few moments passed then before Jester’s voice came through.

_“Sorry! We’re good. Went to Rexxentrum. We’ve got work from Vess. She’s got the coolest tower. There were cookies!”_ A pause. _“Can we talk?”_

The words echoed in his mind for a moment and Essek ignored the way his stomach twisted ever so slightly. _“Of course,”_ he sent off another spell, forcing himself to keep her nickname to himself, because it wouldn’t do either of them any good, _“Tell me where you are, I will meet you there.”_ He knew a few places in Rexxentrum he could teleport to, and since it was already nearing midnight, he assumed Jester and the others had found an Inn to stay at, which would be easy for him to find.

_“I’ll see you in a bit,”_

-

_“Are you sure that this is where you’re staying at?”_ Essek’s voice came through, catching Jester off guard as she finished getting dressed. She had already been wearing her nightgown, but considering he wanted to talk, it didn’t seem like the appropriate attire. _“Unless I took a wrong turn,”_

_“Just give me a minute?”_ She managed, half stumbling out of the door and towards the closed iris in the middle of the room.  
_“Why, are you naked?”_ His words made Jester stop in her tracks and she half wanted to laugh, half wanted to cry. She had spent the last three days trying to figure out when they had gone from flirty banter to something that tugged on her heart strings in such a way that it was hard to breathe whenever she thought about him, and yet she had no idea when or how it had happened, only that there was no going back now.

Shaking herself out of it, Jester eventually descended to the ground floor of the tower and then stepped out of the improvised wardrobe. She could feel her chest tighten at the thought of seeing him, her hands shaking ever so slightly as she walked down the stairs and into the pub area of the Inn. There were a few people still up, some drinking and some having already passed out at the tables.  
Essek, being the complete opposite of everyone in here, stood out like a sore thumb where he was waiting by the door, and Jester had to focus on setting one foot in front of the other so she wouldn’t just stop and stare.

“Jester.” His was voice soft and it made her heart hurt as she came to a halt in front of him. She wanted nothing more than to throw her arms around him and just feel the familiar way his body melted into her own, but she was also aware that it probably wasn’t the best idea considering how up in the air things were at the moment. “So...this actually is where you’re staying,”

Shaking herself out of it once more, Jester nodded towards the stairs. “I’ll show you in a minute. Caleb did a thing for us. Come on.” She resisted the urge to take his hand, hoping that he would follow her anyways as she made her way back up the stairs and into the room that contained the improvised wardrobe.

“Interesting,” She eventually heard him mutter behind her as they stepped inside, and somehow Caleb must have programmed this thing to recognize their friends, because neither of them had trouble entering the tower.

Jester fought the urge to show him all the little details Caleb had included, along with the kitchens and cat servants, because it would only be a distraction from the inevitable. So instead she made her way back to her room, closing the door once Essek was inside.

For a moment neither of them said a word, the crackling sound of the fireplace being the only noise in the room, and when Jester looked up, Essek’s eyes had already found her. She could feel her chest tightening again, watching as he took a step towards her.

“Darling,” Jester attempted to take a step backwards, but found her back hitting the door as his hand came up to rest against her cheek. “I’ve missed you,”

Jester felt her resistance crumble as she leaned into the touch, feeling his warm hand against her skin. Her own hands twitched at her sides in one last attempt to hold back, but she was aware that she wouldn’t be able to control herself if he came any closer.

“Essek.” Jester’s voice was breathless and when he leaned in to trail his lips across her jaw and down to her neck, her hands flew to his sides, tangling themselves in his cloak. It was confusing, the mix of want and a rational voice in the back of her mind telling her that this wasn’t right. The irrational side of her was winning, though, especially with how he was pressing her against the door, one hand sliding into her hair to pull her head back and expose her neck even more.

Jester’s head was spinning, and she did her best to ignore the way her chest seemed to tighten even more with all the words she didn’t seem to be able to articulate. It took her a moment to realize that Essek had stilled, and when he pulled back to look at her, Jester had to remind herself to breathe.

“You don’t want to,” He noticed, cocking his head to the side ever so slightly, and Jester couldn’t help the tears that were pooling in the corners of her eyes.

“N-No, no. I want to. So much.” She whispered, her voice breaking ever so slightly as she untangled her hands from his cloak to wipe at her eyes. “I just...I need to...” She had no idea where to even start, and deep-down Jester was terrified that she could lose all of this, lose him, and yet she also knew that there was no way around this talk, she was going to get her heart broken eventually.

“Jester,” Essek’s voice was soft as he reached up to rest a hand against her cheek, wiping away some of the tears that were now falling. “What’s wrong?”

It was getting progressively harder to breathe with the way her chest tightened, and Jester forced herself to take in a deep breath, bottom lip pulled between her teeth. “I was going to...to talk to you, but then my Mama said you were gone already and...” She sighed, and Essek’s eyes found hers for a moment.

“That’s why you’re upset? I had to leave...and I thought about waking you up, but you seemed fast asleep and when you didn’t come to my room during the night I figured...” he trailed off for a moment. “I apologize if I hurt your feelings,”

Shaking her head, Jester fought the urge to lean into his touch, but failed miserably. “That’s...that’s the problem...I shouldn’t be having these feelings, because it’s just...sex.” The words hung in the air for a moment, and when she finally met his eyes again, Essek’s expression had gone from apologetic, to puzzled to soft again.

“Darling...” He then whispered, shaking his head ever so slightly. “Do you really think I would be doing this with you if I didn’t have any feelings for you?”

Jester needed a moment to process the words that had been spoken, because while they made sense in her head, she couldn’t quite believe them. “I don’t do this kind of thing with just anyone. In fact...it’s been a very long time since I have done this with someone, but you...you are irresistible,” A small chuckle fell from his lips as he leaned in a little closer. “And I don’t just mean in a physical way. You make me laugh, which really isn’t a usual occurrence, and I have found that I would literally do anything for you if you asked me to.”

“Kiss me then,” Jester whispered, her heart missing a beat as their eyes met once again before she noticed the way Essek’s lips curved into a smile.

“As you wish,” And then he was kissing her, his lips soft against her own and Jester wrapped her arms around him with a sigh, the weight of the world seemingly lifted from her shoulders at that very moment. She wasn’t quite sure how long they stayed this way, but Jester eventually pulled back, her cheeks tinted a darker shade of blue as she intertwined her fingers with Essek’s and pulled him along, through the art studio and into her room.

His cloak was lost somewhere along the way and when Jester pulled him in for another kiss, he was already undoing the buttons of her dress so he could slide it off her shoulders. It didn’t take long until they were both naked and tumbling onto the bed, their bodies melting against each other as they continued the kiss.

“Oh Darling, I’ve missed you...” Essek whispered, his lips tracing patterns down her neck and collarbone, before wandering deeper and Jester found herself moaning as she felt him suck a bruise into the skin just above her hip. _Mine_. It seemed to say, and Jester felt the blush on her cheeks deepen at the thought of belonging to someone. Belonging to _him_.

Her hands slid into his carefully styled hair and she found herself giggling as she messed it up, only being interrupted by her own gasp as his lips began to press kisses to the inside of her thighs.

Jester lost herself in his mouth on her then, panting by the time she pulled him up to kiss him again, her legs wrapping around his waist as he slipped into her with ease.

It was slow and soft, and yet there was an intensity to it that had Jester moaning and digging her fingernails into his back, knowing that she was going to leave marks. “Essek...” There were many more things she wanted to say, and yet his name seemed to be the only thing that made sense in the haze of the moment, so that was what she focused on until his lips found hers again.

It didn’t take long until Jester was arching off the bed and into him, a long moan slipping past her lips as she came, with Essek following soon after.

She once again lost track of time after that once more, because everything was warm and comfortable, and neither of them had to be anywhere other than right here.

It wasn’t until she noticed Essek’s hand brushing a strand of hair from her face that Jester came somewhat back to herself, turning her head to look at him. “Stay?” She muttered, curling her body around his as she was met with a soft smile.

“Always, Darling.”


End file.
